Heads Up July 31, 2008

Since many of you know that our ultrasound appointment is tomorrow (Friday), I just wanted to give you the heads up that it is not until 3:00 in the afternoon.  I’ve had a couple friendly “admonishments” that it takes me too long to post after my appointments.  I completely understand.  I’m one of those people also that will check a website non-stop if I know someone is about to have big news, i.e. nearing their due date or having a baby.  So to save you from hopping on the computer every half hour, I wanted to let you know that I probably won’t be posting until late Friday evening (after 7) or maybe even Saturday morning. 

I also wanted to ask another small favor.  Please pray for Dr. Sloan, Dr. Whitehead, and Dr. Den Haese.  Dr. Sloan is the pernataologist that we see at the hospital for the ultrasounds.  Dr. Whitehead is my official OB and Dr. Den Haese is the OB doctor that I will be seeing next Thursday.  Please just pray for wisdom for them and that they would be in agreement on what the best plan of action would be.  I know that Dr. Whitehead is a Christian, but I am not sure about the other two doctors. 

Thanks again for all of your prayers.  I’m not sure what to expect tomorrow, but God’s peace has been guarding my heart and mind and I’m not very anxious.

23 Week Checkup July 24, 2008

Hello all!  I don’t have much exciting to say other than to give you an update on my OB visit.  It was rather uneventful, which is a good thing.  My blood pressue is good, I’m gaining weight (although I won’t disclose how much), the heartbeats are healthy, and I’m growing.  They did request to see me in 2 weeks so I think I’m going to be at a doctor almost every week or every other week.  That’s normal for a high risk/multiple pregnancy.

I go for my next ultrasound next Friday so until then I won’t have any measurement updates to give you.  The one thing that has been really cool though is that I have been feeling them move a lot.  This morning I even saw the movement several times.  That was really cool!  Besides the obvious protruding belly, seeing them and feeling them move seem to make it more real.  Thank you again to all you who are praying for Hannah and Kate.  God truly has blessed us with peace as we have Him and so many others helping us carry this burden.

Belly & Nursery Pictures July 19, 2008

For those of you who have been waiting patiently to see my growing belly…here it is.  I’ve been growing abour 3/4 to 1 inch a week.  I am currently 22 weeks and a couple of days. 

Sarah, Katie (a friend from church), and I have also been working on painting the nursery.  No, I haven’t been involved in the actual painting.  I’ve just painted the chair rail, which was outside and there was a breeze.  It’s still a work in progress, but it’s about 80% done!  I’m so excited!  I’m not sure why the pictures are not enlarging correctly when you click on them to see a bigger view, but I think you can see the main focus of the picture!  Enjoy…

He does no wrong July 17, 2008

I have been going through a ladies bible study with some women from my bible fellowship class for the last 6 weeks or so and God has really been teaching me to cling to Him through this time.  The study is “Lord, Where Are You When Bad Things Happen?” by Kay Arthur.  It’s about the book of Habakkuk.  Habakkuk was a prophet who was crying out to the Lord for the nation of Judah and couldn’t understand how such a good God could allow the Babylonians to invade God’s chosen people, who by the way were worshipping false idols at the time.  God basically tells Habakkuk that the invasion is going to to happen no matter what and Habakkuk comes to the point where He can praise God even when God is allowing bad things to happen.  When we first started the study I felt good about reading a lot of this stuff because I finally felt like I was out of the dark valley of “infertility” and grieving over the loss of our first baby.  So much of what I was learning seemed to really relate to what I HAD gone through. 

This week has focused on who God is.  I really can say that I have a peace about my daughters’ lives.  We have been SO INCREDIBLY blessed by the amount of people who are praying for us.  He is amazing me with the fellowship of brothers and sisters (many whom I don’t even know) in Christ who are praying for my daughters(I love saying that).  It truly brings tears of joy to my eyes to know that people care about two precious girls because they were created by Him.  Even though I have peace and faith that nothing is impossible with God, there is still some uncertainty.  Satan still tries to plant the “maybes” and “what-ifs” in my mind.  One of the daily devotions this week focused on Deuteronomy 32. 

“He is the Rock, his works are perfect, and all his ways are just.  A faithful God who does no wrong, upright and just is he.”                        (Deut. 32:4)

“His works are perfect”…God alone is our Creator.  His work in my womb is perfect.  “A faithful God who does no wrong…” It is not in His character to mess something up.  He can’t.  He did not mess up when He created Hannah’s cord connection to be abnormal.  I don’t know how all of this is going to work out, but I do know that this isn’t some screw up in God’s plan.  Every morning when I pray for my daughters, I thank God for today with them.  God’s plan for us is long term, but so many places in scripture, He references just focusing on today.  The last couple of days, I’ve been praying that He would provide Hannah with her “daily bread”.  God gives us what we need for today.  My prayer is that God would simply given Hannah and Kate the nourishment that they need to grow for today.

Thank you for all of you that are praying for Hannah and Kate.  I think God is already teaching me about selflessly loving as a parent because I’m not worried about how we’ll (George and I) come out of this.  I just want my children to be okay.  My prayer for you all has been that God would bless you for loving and encouraging us.  We love you.

Daytona Beach July 14, 2008

Matt, Sarah, George and I all went over to Daytona Beach this past weekend.  We spent the night on Friday night and then spent most of the day on Saturday at the beach.  The water was a cool 73 degrees.  Just enough for me to get in up to my knees and then decide I couldn’t get all the way in.  It was a really cloudy day so the sun wasn’t going to heat me up.  I was pretty much designated the “beached whale.”  I am more than happy to have that title.  The other three did have a great time boogie boarding and surfing.  The highlight of our afternoon was walking about 3/4 of a mile down the beach to get lunch and coming back and finding the tide had gotten all of our stuff wet.  That’s when we decided to pack up and go home. 

Here are some pictures of the trip.  There will be more to come, including my lovely growing belly in my maternity swimsuit.  Or as George affectionately refers to me as his personal floatation device.  There is also an adorable picture of Bella with my maternity pillow.

A Bigger Miracle July 13, 2008

Sorry for the delay in posting the ultrasound update.  We had our appointment on Friday afternoon and then quickly left for Daytona Beach until Saturday evening. 

The doctor’s diagnosis was good and disappointing.  The good news is that Hannah and Kate are both growing.  Strong, healthy heartbeats and they are definitely moving around!  Hannah is up to 10 oz. and Kate is 1 pound 1 ounce.  I can’t believe she’s already a pound!  I know that’s so small, but it seems like such a big leap!  Their difference in weight is where the problem lies.  As long as their growth difference ratio is less than 30% there is no significant risk to either baby.  However, Hannah and Kate’s difference is 38% and we are fairly early in the pregnancy.  I will be going back in 3 weeks to assess their growth again.  At that point I will be 24 weeks and if the gap continues to widen we have to start looking at the risks of premature birth versus Hannah being stillborn.  Dr. Sloan said the ultimate goal is to make it to 34 weeks.  They attribute the small growth for Hannah to her cord insertion.  Hannah’s cord insertion is the velamentous insertion (http://www.vasaprevia.com/vasaprevia/velamentous.htm).  This means that the cord is actually not directly hooked into the placenta, but the membranes.  There is nothing that can be done to fix the situation.  It won’t help if I eat more food or lie on a particular side.  It’s just the way it is.  Again though, he left us with this: Your babies are doing fine. 

Those are the facts…so how are we doing?  It was really hard to hear at first.  It’s scary to think that in 3 weeks, we could be facing the reality of delivering our babies.  We both just want so badly to bring home two healthy baby girls.  We don’t want to see them hooked up to machines for the first months of their lives.  As much as we are ready to meet our daughters, we can patiently wait until they are full term.  Please keep them in your prayers, especially Hannah.  I told George this on the way home from the hospital and I hope that God keeps the attitude of my heart hoping and not worrying.  I said to him, “This just means we are expecting a bigger miracle now.”  God can do it.  He can supernaturally intervene in my womb to make sure Hannah is growing.  He can “fix” her cord insertion.  If He chooses their birthdate to be long before we expected, He can sustain them.  He is a mighty and sovereign God.  He is able.  Sometimes my flesh tries to convince me otherwise though.  Pray that we would be able to share God’s power with our doctors as we watch Him move in a mighty way.

New Pictures July 8, 2008

Nothing too new to report here…until Friday.  I had some requests for pictures that were not just baby pictures so I thought I put a couple on here.  There are two pictures that are from the 4th of July Parade that we participated in with George’s parent’s Bible Fellowship group from church.  You must be thinking that being 4 1/2 months pregnant, I would be crazy to walk in a parade.  You’re right.  That’s why I didn’t walk.  George’s truck got to proudly pull one of the floats so we rode in a pleasantly air conditioned vehicle. 

There is also a picture of our little princess, Bella.  She’s fallen in love with her mommy’s new maternity body pillow (as you can tell).  The rainbow picture is from our backyard.  We had two beautiful rainbows, one that was a full one and the other just a half.  I think you can only see half of the full one in the picture though.  What a beautiful picture of God’s creation!

Remembering Our First July 3, 2008

Most of you probably don’t think of July 3rd as any significant date, but to me it is a date of slight sadness.  Everyone (including myself) is so caught up in the joy of our current pregnancy that many do not remember that this would have been the expected arrival date of our first baby.  Do I condemn anyone for forgetting?  No, no, and no.  God has done so much in our lives since our loss that there is no sense in dwelling on it, except maybe if that baby was to call you mom.  This day will start and end just like any other day.  I am not having a depressing day because of the joy that this day should have held.  I truly can say that God has done so much healing, restoration, and blessing that I have peace over my baby being in heaven with Him.  He has lifted a darkness that I wasn’t sure how I would ever get out of.  It is not because of Him that there is a hint of sadness today, but it is because of Him that I have hope and peace today. 

To my precious little one in heaven, you will never be forgotten.  You were an answer to prayer and we are grateful that He gave us the privilege of entrusting you to us for such a short time.  We can’t wait to meet you in heaven one day.